Dorian Gray no. 34

Penguin Classics, with Bill Amberg, 2008

Price: £50

History: This collection can barely count as my very own. Almost everyone I know has contributed, many by sending me copies from all over the globe, others just by seeking them out for me. Someone tipped me off that there was a very expensive copy in Waterstones, Picadilly - I went hunting, and there it was - in nice neat brown boxes in the corner of that wonderful shop. There are five other books in the collection - "who on EARTH would buy one of these at that price?!", I found myself asking as I gently levered Dorian Gray off the shelf and into my arms. At that point, I thought I'd better OK the purchase with my parents, who offered to get it as a Christmas present. Sorted!

So. £50?! I hear you say. It's a prestige thing. If it weren't for my collection, I too would be asking "who would pay that much for a book? Isn't it the contents that matter?!" But I have wanted a really expensive, deluxe copy for a long time now; and as a collector, don't I deserve one? I'd kill for a first edition, but would never be able to afford one. And I'd be too afraid of mistreating it. No one else, however, has any excuse at all...

Look: The price is down to the leather binding, which surrounds the creamy pages. What's more, it comes in a gorgeous brown card box, wrapped in thin white tissue. It was specially designed by this Bill Amberg character for Penguin. It comes with a bookmark, which has the book's name embossed on it - just in case you forget what you're reading half way through. Although I wouldn't actually use it. According to the information sheet, the binding will actually improve with use. I'm ready to believe them - a bit like expensive designer clothes, in part you are paying for the label, but they also hang together in a way that cheap clothes simply don't.

Introduction/Appendices: None, but there is a slip in the front reminding you why you just wasted so much money, and explaining that the leather comes from naturally dead creatures.